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How old were you when your ears were pierced? I stress the were pierced part because most of us weren’t involved in, or even aware of, the decision to pierce our ears. But, I’m okay with that. I didn’t grow up angry at my parents for mutilating my perfect little ear lobes and forcing their gender-biases on me, did you?
In my experience, piercing a baby’s ears was normal procedure, and it was only until recently that I realized that this was a cultural custom. I didn’t realize that some people believe it is cruel to pierce a hole in a baby’s ear without their consent. Instead, they wait until the child is old enough to decide if they want to or not.
I can understand this point of view, as it shows respect for the child, which I believe we sometimes lack or tend to ignore as a culture. Through this perspective, piercing your child’s ears without asking permission is just as bad as our tendency to say No, because I said so, instead of explaining to the child the reasons why.
And yet, even while understanding their point of view, I still don’t see the big deal in piercing a baby’s ears. It’s not like it’s irreversible. If they decide that they don’t want pierced ears when they’re older, they can just let them close up. Y ya! Like it never even happened.
Perhaps this is why I was shocked when reading the comments to one mother’s account of piercing her six-month-old baby girl’s ears. People were calling it an atrocity, an ancient tribal practice, comparing it to genital mutilation and Chinese foot-binding. They even said that only low-class people pierce their baby’s ears.
It’s strange to see such outrage over an issue that to most of us seems insignificant. We probably don’t even think twice about it when we do it: it’s that ingrained in our culture. Maybe if we had more of a backlash from our daughters, we’d put more thought and consideration into what she would want when she gets older. But, most of the time, women who didn’t get their ears pierced as a baby get it done as an adult anyway.
Calling the piercing of a baby’s ears an atrocity is going overboard. There are real atrocities happening to children, such as child abuse and neglect. Is it vain, and stereotypical, to want my baby to “look like a girl” and “look pretty”? Maybe so. But, if piercing my baby’s ears is the worst thing I could ever do to my child, then so be it.
About Cindy Tovar
Growing up with an Argentine abuela, it never crossed my mind to question piercing infant ears. Not even when she took a needle to reopen the holes when I returned to her home at 7-years-old. No, I never questioned it until I dated an ENT resident at Columbia Presbyterian Medical Center who saw a baby die from an infection that spread to the brain.
Later, when I married and had a child with that same physician, I waited to pierce my daughter’s ears. The American Academy of Pediatrics recommends waiting until a child is 5 years old before piercing ears. But I only waited until she was a toddler. However, we went to a licensed center and I was extremely vigilant about keeping the ears free of infection.
For me, it was a matter of weighing my cultural bias against science. So I did what I could to strike a happy medium.
I was told that getting ears peirced as a baby was a better way of getting out of the way, and its less traumatic. I remember my little sisters getting their peircings done by our family doctor at his clinic (I’m pretty sure it was at the clinic), they didn’t cry or even seem to notice what was going one. Y ya! It was done.
However, I do recall one of my good friends getting her ears peirced when she was 8. She decided she wanted them done. Now that was a terrible thing to see. She says it was even worse to experience it. She still do this day wishes her mom had peirced her when she was a baby so the whole thing could have been avoided.
Exposing children to the third-rate Public School System and it’s initiative to condition children to never question authority is child abuse. XD
Uhmm…let’s see.
Exposing children to Reggeaton at any age can be considered child abuse. Teaching children Spanish and encouraging them to speak the language whenever the opportunity presents itself an be considered child abuse (taking into account the occasional spat over ‘policies’ implemented to discourage such ‘behaviour). Smoking while in close proximity to children can be considered child abuse. Limiting access to the game console can be considered child abuse. Telling your child (for the Nth time) to clean-up their bedroom can be considered child abuse.
And that’s the short list. *-*
It’s kinda trashy imo…
^^^ how about ur trashy!!
Some people need to calm the eff down about it.
@ Andrew…let me tell you something. I pierced my son’s ears when he was 11 months old and it is definately not abuse..
Most latinos do this…not abuse!!!
I got my ears piecred at a young age. it’s a cultural custom. Is the circumcision of a male when he is born child abuse? Though I am happy that child abuse is an important issue in this country sometimes i think it’s gotten a little bit overboard. It’s like there is a blur on what is actually child abuse. What is child abuse and what is not? Heck a women was arrested for child abuse/endangerment because she let her kid walk to school by himself.
It’s cultural Andrew, so what is trashy to you isn’t to Latinos…we however might find some of your traditions to be beyond trashy to Latinos…
Maria…#1…every parent that DOES abuse their kids says they don’t…so you saying it
this is ridiculous really…. something else for people to complain and gripe about… all my girl cousins, myslef, sister, my daughter, friends daughters all got their ears pierced as babies….. we all turned out just fine… to call it child abuse and “low-class people pierce their baby’s ears” is ridiculous.
It’s definitely no worse than having a baby boy circumcized without his permission… why isn’t THAT called an “atrocity” and an “ancient tribal practice”?
Then all these chicks that pierce every private part of their bodies, that’s abuse too!
I had mine done before I was a year old. Not only is it a Latin thing, it’s just a thing people do. Weather you think it’s trashy or not, it’s still not abuse.
No big deal, move on…
If piercing ears is child abuse than what exactly would you consider Circumcision? I say save the child abuse accusations for when its really happening!
Sorry…hit enter too fast. You saying it’s not abuse doesnt make it so. #2…Andrew didn’t say it was abuse, he said it was trashy…my parents thought the same thing & made me wait till 13…my sons were 10. I think it’s a personal choice but to me, it’s a PIA that I, as a parent, didn’t want to deal with
I find that “eating chocolate cake out of a diaper” game that some Americans play at baby showers to be trashy…but that ain’t abuse. Ear piercing isn’t cihld abuse–it hurts for a minute and then it’s done. I think it’s better in the end because if you pierce the baby’s ears before they are old enough to touch at them, they are less likely to get them infected. Also, they don’t grow over if you decide not to wear earrings for a long time like piercings you get later in life. My baby is five months old and I am going to get them done soon I think, before she gets fidgety and at that age where she wants to touch everything. Child endangerment is bizarre, some woman threatened to call the cops on me because my baby was in a baby carrier without a blanket over her head in 50 degree weather–she was wearing a sweater and a hat and she was snuggled up to me! JEEZ!
@Maria Soledad, why would you pierce your son’s ears before he can consent to it? Those holes will always be visible and he may not like it when he’s older. Are you thinking about his future and how he will be perceived in his professional life?
I had my ears pierced in the 6th grade. I never forget the head librarian at my elementary school calling it “barbaric.”
Man! I’m glad my mom did it to me when I was a baby so I wouldn’t have to remember the pain if I get them in a later age. People need to calm down. People have always been doing it. You take em off chances are the whole will close and if it doesn’t its not like a one of the giant wholes emo people make on their ears. Its a tiny little piercing.
My mom got my ears pierced when I was an infant (I’m 25 now). I have no idea why anyone would call it abuse. It’s ridiculous.
So here’s a fundamental flaw in knee jerk reactions: Andrew starts the thread by saying its readjustment in his opinion. Two people reply directly back to him. One ends with “and its not abuse”…the other says “its cultural….what is trashy to you isn’t to Latinos..” Andrew never mentions abuse or Latinos in his post. I don’t get it. Anyway, in response to the article….I think parents who wait to ask are very considerate. But in my family I’m def used to seeing earrings very early in life….I’m cool either way.
There is a thing called “medical piercing” you can actually go to a pediatric office and have them pierce your child’s ears. I don’t think piercings and abuse go hand in hand. Like lots have said already its a cultural practice that has been around since the beginning of time. People just need something to complain about i guess.
TRASHY…not READJUSTMENT…damn autocorrect! LOL
My daughter is 16 now. I pierced her ears at 1 month old. I’m a Mexican woman and it is traditional. I was the same age as well. And far from being trashy.
It is a tradition in the Mexican-American community. My mother had my ears pierced, along with my sisters.
i agree that a baby with pierced ears looks trashy but it’s not child abuse…
I am Mexican married to an Australian. And when I brought up the subject about piercing baby ears, he went crazy on me saying that that was not a right thing to do, that it was ridiculous, blah blah blah. Long story short. I think Caucasians (or white people, whatever you prefer) don’t understand that it is a cultural thing. Irony is, when they are teens/adults, they have more piercings and tattoos than the average latino… so who is the ridiculous one here?