Photo: Jessenia Martinez
After a drunken night of passion, leaving the next morning can be difficult or easy, depending on the person. After collecting your things and getting dressed, will you hold your head up high or will you avert your eyes as you make your way back home?
Usually, the walk of shame is associated with women, who risk looking promiscuous if seen leaving a man’s house early in the morning in last night’s clothes. It’s unfortunate, but it’s true. When we see it, we shake our heads and say: “Mmm, mmm, mmm…I know what she’s been doing.”
Now, according to the Urban Dictionary, when a guy is seen leaving a woman’s house, it’s not called the walk of shame, but the stride of pride. For men, their actions from the previous night earn them respect from their friends. There is no shame in what they did, and they will probably brag about it.
Have we come across another double standard? Yes, but let’s consider this: While it’s true that a woman’s reputation takes a hit when she’s seen doing the walk, the walk isn’t exclusive to women, just as the stride isn’t exclusive to men.
Under certain circumstances, some men experience the walk, too. For example, if the woman they’ve spent the night with is unattractive, then there are no bragging rights to be had, and they’d rather not be seen leaving her house. Or if the woman is off-limits for whatever reason (she’s married, he’s married, she’s his best friend’s girl, etc.), then being seen could be very risky.
On the other hand, some women can also experience the stride of pride. If the man they’ve been with is very attractive, or perhaps has some type of celebrity status, then yes: women will see it as an accomplishment and will strut their stuff. Or if the night was really amazing, some women will just leave, hair disheveled and make-up ruined, too happy and relaxed to care who sees them.
The majority of the time, though, women continue being victims of the walk of shame. Why is there even a walk? It’s 2012, and women should be able to have a one night stand (using protection, of course) without worrying about the consequences of the following morning. It’s all a matter of choice and attitude. If you walk out proudly in the morning, then you’re choosing not to feel ashamed of what you’ve done. If you creep nervously like you’re afraid to be seen, that’s also your choice.
Ladies, let’s do away with the walk of shame. We have sex, and we enjoy it. People need to get over it. Let’s hold our heads up high, and turn all those walks into strides.
About Cindy Tovar
Wow! Everyone should walk the stride of pride!
always was a stride of pride for me..”yeah,i’ll call u later papi..”
No self respecting woman would ever put herself in this situation.
I guess your way of attacking the double standard is condoning and promoting promiscuity as oppose to offering another alternative?
Bendito….I miss my 20′s !!
I Like
Why does it have to be shame OR pride? I call it “going back home with a hangover.”
sluts are cool
It depends on who you slept with.
Nah, we know why is called the walk of shame and why is associated with women: a woman would never look the same way as when she was at the club or before hitting it after being with a man, there’s roughness, hair pulling, ect and we men do not possess the right equipment for women to get back to a decent shape. A man just probably needs a shower at the most.
I will never understand the “papi”, That’s what little latino kids call their fathers. Now its been turned into something sexual. What’s next, Oooo yes, just like that abuelita?
What are we twelve. Human beings like to have sex.
Although I never had enough game back in the day to take the stride of pride I blv we’re all adults. I only hope, as adults, folks are having responsible/consentual sex. And the walk of shame is up to the individual. We will never be able to control the petty things people say. BUT, if you walk out in glasses & hood looking like the Una-Bomber with your head hung low….man or woman….then you have to ask yourself “what did I just do & why do I feel this way???”. Take ownership and leave like any self respecting adult would leave……via the backroom window & firescape!!!! Lolol
The way I’ve always looked at it is, I’m a grown woman. People are always going to talk smack. If any neighbors saw me coming home or leaving someone’s house at 9 am, screw it, as the saying goes, they’re not paying my bills,what business is it of theirs?
This article should be duplicated many times and distributed in front of Night Clubs and let’s all have fun ! Women can do what they want ! But don’t complain when someone doesn’t want to take you seriously or Marry you!
Men and women should respect themselves and not engage in this type of behavior, for it will only lead to destruction.
Gentlepeople, forget the one night stands and bring back the sanctity of a monogamous relationship and save it for the honeymoon!
I don’t agree with this at ALL. There ARE consequences to one night stands and acting like it is healthy and even encouraged to have casual sex is just wrong. Men and women alike meed to respect their own bodies enough to realize that “casual sex” is the biggest oxymoron ever. Sex shouldn’t be casual, it is sacred and meant to share with someone you have a special connection to. I know this makes me “old fashioned” or whatever but this attitude of having pride in screwing anything that moves is exactly why girls are so oversexualized these days. And we wonder why teens still get pregnant? I’m disgusted.