Bachelor/Bachelorette Parties: Rite of passage or right to cheat?

Gleeful groomsmen everywhere await this time of year – bachelor party time! Meanwhile, wives and girlfriends alike are forced to make up their minds as to whether or not they will let their loved ones venture off to Vegas, Cancun or even a friendly neighborhood Hooters. Some ladies argue, “I trust my man, so I don’t care what he does. He won’t cheat.” While others shut the idea down immediately and simply tell their partners, “You are not going.” After befriending both types of women and hearing all sides of their argument, I found that women aren’t the only ones torn over whether or not they should let their partners free for a night; men also held similar sympathies about bachelorette parties

For those who are unsure of whether to take the leap of faith or not, this information goes out to you.

First off, cheating on a partner or spouse is usually not premeditated and is more likely to occur when a person is placed in a new overwhelming situation known as a brief encounter. Partners who are leery of bachelor/bachelorette parties actually have justified worries after all! The simple fact is that most bachelor parties take men around overwhelmingly beautiful women, and women around overwhelmingly hot men. So whether you like it or not, if you choose to be involved in “overwhelming” situations, the likelihood that you will cheat rises. Even the most devoted partners are at risk of entering compromising situations.

However, it is possible for spouses and boyfriends/girlfriends to attend bachelor/bachelorette parties without leaving their partners stressed out over the possibility of cheating. As a warning, let it be known that releasing your partner into the wild is no easy task and should only be tested out by strong couples. A relationship on the rocks is not in a position to challenge its strength.  So if you are up for the challenge and your partner is okay with it, by all means attend the party.

A pre-cautionary step couples can take to combat the natural tendency to be seduced by beautiful men and women is taking time to communicate concerns and explain the party’s itinerary. Hashing out arguments in advance will leave plenty of time for making up, resulting in a happy ending for the both of you. Whatever terms the couple agrees upon will be expected to be followed while at the big outing. Trust will undeniably increase if both sides hold up their part of the deal.

The second option that has no risk involved is to opt for outings where you can hang out with your soon-to-be married friends in more intimate and appropriate settings, like a spa or sports game.

The point of a bachelor/bachelorette party is supporting your friend during their journey into marriage. This is possible to do without additional stress to your own relationship.  In my opinion, leave the thunder down under between you and your partner.  It will make life so much easier.

Ces’Ari (pronounced Chez-ah-ree) earned a B.A. in Political Science from the University of California, Irvine, and a M.Ed. from Arizona State University, while simultaneously balancing writing and marriage. Read more about Ces’Ari on her personal blog.