I had just turned three when my younger brother was born. I was amazed at this chubby little creature and I remember wanting to hold him all
the time. My mom made me sit on the bed so that I wouldn’t drop him. He was so heavy I could only hold him for a while before mom had to take him, but soon I’d be asking to hold him again. It was easier when my older brother held him, then I could stroke his cheek or kiss his pink lips without a worry in the world. We had this big, red “bowl” we would bathe him in – I remember that red bowl so well.
And I remember that day so clearly. The sadness and the pain that filled our apartment. Mom tried to explain to me, but how do you tell a three-year-old that her hermanito is dead? My brother got to be a month old before he died of Sudden infant death syndrome (SIDS). Next week, on October 26th, would’ve been his 25th birthday.
An estimated 500,000 miscarriages happen each year; 1 in every 148 babies is stillborn; and 3 in every 1000 babies die shortly after birth. This in the developed world alone. The sorrow that we feel about losing a child, even after such a short amount of time, is just as painful as it is losing them later in life. I always wonder what my brother would’ve looked like, if he would’ve been like me or my opposite. What would’ve made him laugh and what would’ve made him cry? I will never know that, but I will always love him.
Today is the American Day of Remembrance for Pregnancy Loss and Infant Death, which include stillbirth, miscarriage, SIDS and the death of a newborn. Organizations over the world are encouraging what they call Wave of Light-events today at 7pm. We light a candle in honor of these children, and leave it burning for an hour, so that a Wave of Light will span all over the world. I hope that you join me in lighting a candle. 
If you want to learn more, I have compiled a list of links for you:
Pregnany & Infant Loss Awareness & Research Institute
Pregnancy & Infant Loss Support, Inc
SIDS on Center for Disease Control
First Candle
by Jennifer Turano
About Being Latino Contributors
This was a very touching piece. I’m so sorry for your loss. Whether it was one month ago to a year ago to 100 years ago, it hurts all the same. My candle is lit for our little ones. Great piece Jen.
WoW. What a powerful and touching piece, Jen. I am in tears and thank you for sharing your experience. My candle will be lit tonight as well. Thank you for the information. It is greatly appreciated.
Gracias Arlene – I think it’s good for us to have this day to remember together.
Beautiful blog Jen! Thank you for sharing your passion,
and also hugs for sharing that tragic life experience. It is important to get awareness of infant death to people no matter what the situation is. The sad part is that so many do not listen, they continue to smoke, drink, take drugs during the time. Companies design things that have no business being sold to people, with the idea of putting it in a baby’s crib. The awareness needs to get out there. I hope your blog can help spread it wider.
Thanx Xeno and Mo2 – there is still so much we don’t know about this. But I hope these organizations will grow stronger and that there will be more research
Very touching. The loss of a child is the one loss that time cannot heal. My candles will be lit this evening.
I agree with Eileen. Children passing before their parents do seems almost unnatural. It seems like one learns to deal but never gets over such loss. Jennifer, thanks for sharing this personal heartfelt piece and for bring awareness to this issue. Well done.
Jennifer,
This is such a touching piece and hit real close to home. I too, had a half older sister who died exactly a week after being born. My father has always told me since I could remember that she looked so much like me and although I never got to meet her, sometimes I wonder what would it be like to have my 29yr old sister alive.
May he rest in peace en las manos de Diosito…
PS. Oct 26 is my Bday, I will make sure to celebrate the memory of him with you.
Thank you so much Keyla, that means a lot to me