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Is there a right way to break up with a friend?

Many of us pick up different friends along our individual paths through college, different jobs, and sometimes different cities. Sometimes, we know these friends will be around for a lifetime and sometimes, they are an important but not permanent part of our journey.

Experts have called this process of deselecting friends as we age socioemotional selectivity theory. At different points in our lives, we decide that a friend is on a divergent path from our own or is creating too much negative energy to keep around.

In that situation, many take the passive approach—declining every request to hang out repeatedly. But experts recommend a more direct tact, one you might apply to a romantic relationship: having a heart-to-heart talk, writing a letter or even an email. Anything but a text.

Ultimately breaking up with a friend in real life is harder than defriending them on Facebook.

Read more at The New York Times.

About Adriana Villavicencio

Dr. Adriana Villavicencio is the youngest child of Ecuadorian immigrants. She has moved 29 times in her life, taking her on a journey from California to Bangalore, India, and New York City, where she recently earned a Ph.D. in Education Leadership and works as a Research Associate at New York University. An avid traveler, Adriana has collected experiences in four different continents and 16 different countries. But as a former high school English teacher, some of her fondest memories are those of her brilliant and brilliantly funny students in Brooklyn and Oakland. Adriana has contributed to several publications including the Daily News and, and is a managing editor for the Journal of Equity in Education. She earned a B.A. in English and an M.A. in English Education at Columbia University, and currently serves on the board of Columbia’s Latino Alumni Association (LAACU). She enjoys scary movies with red vines, Sauvignon Blanc, and her Maltese dog, Napoleon.

To learn more about Adriana’s education consulting company, please visit

Disclaimer: The views and opinions expressed in this article are solely those of the author and should not be understood to be shared by Being Latino, Inc.

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