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The enemies of love, part nine: Lack of skills

Getty Images

Getty Images

Guys…I can see the puzzled look on your face as you read the title. What skills do I lack, and how could that lack of skills threaten my love life?

In the arena of loving relationships, you could lack:

• Flirting skills – do you know how to flirt with women? Most men don’t.

• Humor skills- Three Stooges kind of funny won’t get you laid. But laughter releases endorphins, and endorphins feel good. If you can be funny, you can get all the dates you want.

• Speaking to women skills – Man up, for God’s sake. If you cannot speak to women, you’re insecure about something. Deal with your issues.

• Dating skills- The most attractive dating skill is to listen to a woman and then do something with her that she doesn’t expect of you. For example…she says she likes musical theater. So take her to a musical.

• Holding someone’s interest skills- people that are readers are more interesting than people who just watch a lot of TV. But holding a woman’s interest is more about listening than entertaining. Be more interested in what the woman is saying than just running your mouth. Get her to talk…she’ll think you’re interesting.

• Reading skills- Some men aren’t well educated and don’t read well. But this is something that is overcome with practice. Read more, and read a wide variety of topics.

• Writing skills- Once again, you can overcome this with practice. Write what you FEEL. But that will require you to get in touch with your feelings and own them.

• Kissing skills- I could write a book just about kissing. Jamming your tongue down her throat isn’t all there is to kissing. Kissing can be incredibly fun and women love it. When’s the last time you kissed a woman’s hand the moment you met her? Be a creative kisser.

• Massage skills- Massage is the best non-sexual way to touch a woman. You can massage her hands on the first date. A foot massage will turn her into putty. Develop your massage skills and you will get to touch women as much as you like.

• Foreplay skills- Make it last.

• Lovemaking skills- Buy the Kama Sutra and read it.

• Commitment skills- I’m not saying you’ve got to marry everybody. There are lots of levels of commitment.  Pick one. Don’t be a male whore.

• Empathy skills- Feel another person’s pain and be a good listener.

• Honesty and intimacy skills- Being distant and dishonest will keep you single. Open up.

• Fighting skills – LEARN how to have a respectful fight. Your parents may not be the best example.  Using the excuse “Because I’m Latino/Latina” is just that…an excuse for bad behavior.

And others I haven’t thought of yet.

But if you want to be considered a Great Lover, you will need to master each one of these skills over time. The sooner, the better.


by Being Latino contributor Russ Longcore. For more articles by Russ Longcore, check out his blog.

About Being Latino Contributors

Being Latino contributors consists of individuals and partner organizations. They join us in our goal of providing our audience with a communication platform designed to educate, entertain and connect all peoples across the global Latino spectrum. Together we aim to break down barriers and foster unity and empowerment through informative, thought-provoking dialogue and exchanging of ideas. Giving a unified voice to the multitude of communities that identify with the multidimensional culture that is Latino.

Disclaimer: The views and opinions expressed in this article are solely those of the author and should not be understood to be shared by Being Latino, Inc.

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