Mitt Romney is not being Latino

Recently, Latinos were greeted with a sense of hope. Despite our presence in North America predating the thirteen British colonies, or the fact that we’re the largest minority in the country, Latinos in the United States have yet to achieve that great symbol of American power – the presidency. Catholics have Kennedy, African-Americans have Obama, and we have…nobody (tear). And yet, recently the Latino blogosphere has been heating up with news that we just might have our first Latino president. No, Bill Richardson hasn’t decided to get some charisma. They say our future ethnic hero could be (drum roll) Mitt Romney. But wait, hold on, before you get an aneurism trying to figure out how someone who said that undocumented immigrants should, “leave and get in line,” could possibly be Latino, have faith, because there is good news, Mitt Romney is not actually Latino.

Let’s looks some facts about Mitt Romney’s supposed Mexican ancestry

• Mitt Romney was born in the U.S.
• While it’s true that Romney’s father George was born in Mexico, near the U.S. border, his parents were of American ancestry.
• George Romney’s grandparents immigrated to Mexico to join a Mormon colony and avoid prosecution for polygamy.
• Members of the Mormon colony didn’t intermarry with the locals.
• George Romney and his parents returned to the United States during the Mexican Revolution
• Mitt Romney does not have any of the Latino cultural traits that mark us as a distinct ethnic group

So there you have it. Mitt Romney’s father had the genetic accident of being born in Mexico. That is all. If my parents had lived in a New Yorker community in Uzbekistan, practiced only New Yorker traditions (being in a rush all the time, knowing where the best pizzerias are, being better than you), and then came back to New York and gave birth to me, it probably wouldn’t make me Uzbek.

Before we all start cooing the next time his Spanish-speaking son narrates another campaign ad, and he reminds the right audience that his father was born in Mexico, let’s remember the truth. I’m not telling how to vote in this upcoming election, and if you vote for Romney, that’s fine. If you’re looking to elect the first Latino president, you may have to wait a bit. Mitt Romney isn’t Latino.